The pitfalls of live poker

With just 24 hours to go before I find myself seated at the Las Vegas Team Challenge III tournament in Birmingham, I feel I should start preparing myself for the big day.

Whether poker can be considered a sport is debatable, but it’s fair to say I won’t be partaking in any of the special preparations that are required of most athletes.

No stretching, no muscle relaxation and certainly no waking up at the crack of dawn to go for a jog after a morning breakfast of two raw eggs. Bleurgh.

Instead, I must come up with a preparation plan for the unique problems any poker player faces when entering a live tournament.

Boredom

Poker is boring. There, I said it. Sitting in one place, folding hand after hand, waiting for something decent can be outrageously dull. More so when you’re playing live and you can’t have multiple online tables open to keep you occupied.

The first day of this tournament is approximately 9 hours of play, with a few breaks. That’s a lot of pots where I won’t be involved. Preventing boredom is one of the key skills of getting better at poker. The more bored you become, the more likely you are to play poor cards at the wrong time just to get some action.

Even professional poker players like Phil Laak can get bored.

Legitimate response: Use the time to study other players when you’re not in the hand. Who’s raising a lot? Who can be bullied out of hands? Every piece of information you gather helps you to build a picture of the quality of the players around you.

My probable response: Drink beer. It’s almost impossible to be bored while drunk.

Cramp/Stiffness

As I’ve outlined above, poker involves a lot of sitting around doing nothing. This can leave even the most flexible of people feeling like they’ve been held captive in a contortionist’s practice box for the day.

This isn’t helped by traditional poker table layouts, which usually crams nine or ten people onto the same table – meaning you are never more than a chronic smoker’s breath away from your opponents. Grim.

Legitimate response: Stretch your legs between hands. Go for a quick walk, check on how your friends are doing or stay by your table if you’re not keen on missing any of the action.

My probable response: Stretch my legs … by walking to the bar.

Body odour

Whether it’s the general lack of a female presence, the extraordinary lengths of time they spend at the table or that they’ve simply spent all of their money on poker rather than toiletries is anyone’s guess – but the fact remains: Poker players stink.

This isn’t the smell of someone who has forgotten to put on deodorant that day. A forgivable, if unpleasant, oversight. This is the overriding stench of built-up dirt and sweat from years, possibly decades, of habitual non-washing.

Imagine a rotting cow carcass, left in the hot sun all day before being gently marinated in the bin juice scavenged from a greasy spoon. That’s the smell of your average poker player. A smell so dense it is difficult to tell whether it’s actually a smell at all, arguably it’s more of a taste in the back of your throat.

Legitimate response: Ignore it. As disgusting as it is, it’s not against the rules to be a smelly beggar. Try to stay down-wind of the worst offenders.

My probable response: Drink more. When the smell becomes unbearable, create an air pocket with my hands and breathe steadily out through the mouth and in through the nose. The sweet aroma of malty hops beats body odour any day of the week.

Annoying drunk guys

Ahem. Okay, obviously the ‘drunk annoying guy’ is usually me. Almost always, in fact. But at the risk of sounding hypocritical, it is really irritating when you have a loud, obnoxious pisshead at the table.

In my defence, I’m a pretty quiet drunk when playing poker, which is not always the case with some of the weekend crowd spotted in some casino poker tournaments.

Harassing the dealer, berating other players and getting irate when their awful play sees them lose a hand, they can disrupt the natural flow of the game. The most annoying are the lucky ones who pick up chips by mindlessly bumbling through hands and hitting miracles on the river.

Legitimate response: Take advantage. These players are normally pretty terrible. Even the adept ones will have impaired judgement. Use this opportunity to collect their chips before they spew them to someone else.

My probable response: Keep one step ahead of their drinking. Drunk people are only annoying when you’re not drunk. It’s almost too simple a solution …

When in Rome ...

Conclusion

Only time will tell what approach I take in the Las Vegas Team Challenge tomorrow: Intelligent, focused and strategic or moronic, drunken and degenerate.

In all seriousness though, I will be playing to win and the top prize of a trip to Las Vegas with a huge chunk of spending money to play in the World Series is a good enough incentive for me to be at my best.

I will be posting tweets throughout the day to keep the blog updated with my progress. These should show up in the right-hand side toolbar or can be viewed at my poker Twitter page.

I’ll also do a full review of the weekend on Monday, with pics, videos and maybe some interviews.

 

Gearing up for the Las Vegas Team Challenge

Okay, I admit, I may – just may – have neglected the blog a bit. A barely noticeable blip of five months without a post.

The main reason is pretty straight-forward, I’ve not been playing much poker, a fairly important ingredient for a blog about my poker-playing escapades.

However, with a dearth in freelance work on the horizon and the upcoming Las Vegas Team Challenge live tournament just a month away, it seems a good time to shake off some ring rust.

The Team Challenge is a fairly intriguing prospect. It begins with an online league of poker teams, each with four people per side. Every week, you and your teammates play multi-table tournaments online, with your final position from these tournaments being converted into ‘points’. The higher you place, the more points you score.

After eleven weeks, your team’s total points is totted up and represents how many ‘extra’ chips your team receives at the live final in Birmingham on the weekend of March 3^rd.

Should your team win the live final, there is a $48,000 Las Vegas package for first prize, which will coincide with the World Series of Poker. Boom.

Unfortunately, it’s nine weeks in and our team’s performance has been decidedly average.

We’re currently sitting mid-table with 3,100 points. To put that in perspective, the team in first place has 16,210. That means each player on their team will start with roughly double our chips at the live final.

The good thing is that a couple of high finishes puts the team straight back in contention, but with only two weeks to go, it’s a tough task.

I will keep the blog updated over the next two weeks and I’ll try to keep a play-by-play account going on the days of the live final (with pictures and maybe interviews with other players).

I’ve not yet decided whether I will tee-total the final, or throw caution to the wind and drown myself in an avalanche of alcohol and shame – it is a special occasion after all.

As for my own Challenge, I’ve totally been slacking but still made a bit of progress. A few small multi-table cashes and a second-place in a Sit ‘N’ Go means I’m edging towards $200. Almost $10,000.

Clearly, I didn’t hit any of my targets from October, but my new totals are below and I will continue to update a little bit more regularly … maybe.

Summary

Challenge: +$25.32

Total profit so far: $189.28

 

Challenge back on track

Summary

Challenge: +$42.41

Total winnings so far: $175.25

For the last couple of days, I’ve been running deep in about 90% of the tournaments I’ve been entering, including three final tables.

Only one of these is really worth mentioning though – a second-place finish in Bwin’s Lucky Dollar tournament for $40.

 

I made it to the final table as chip leader

 

The blinds were going up insanely fast, although it made no mention of it being a turbo in the lobby. This meant that despite being in first place when I made it to the final table, I only had 20 or so big blinds.

Commence shovefest. I stayed out of the action while all the short stacks committed hari-kari, although I was able to extend my lead so that I was still a fairly comfortable chip leader with 7 to go.

Then I got pocket kings. I’ll cut to the chase and say that the other big stack at the table made a bad preflop call and ended up hitting a two-outer on me. On the river.

Despite the setback, I got to work amassing chips as the remaining players tightened up to squeeze higher in the rankings.

The ridiculous blinds ensured it wasn’t too long until it was me and the guy who had fluked me on the river heads-up.

This lasted around … 3 hands? I shoved with A♦ 7♦ and he tanked for ages before calling with my nemesis hand – A2.

I’d already lost with a better ace against A2 twice in this tournament, so it was a fitting tribute to bust out on it again.

 

A wheel on the turn leaves me needing a 2 or 6 on the river. Fat chance.

 

And so I fall short of winning a tournament again. To a suckout, again.

On the one hand, it’s nice to get back up to the $175 region, wiping away most of the last two weeks’ worth of losses in one foul swoop, whereas on the other hand, it sucks ass to keep coming second and third.

I’ve been playing pretty solidly though, and I have done well to take a break every time I get unlucky so that I don’t start tilting.

Unfortunately, I naturally deviate towards the fridge on my breaks, meaning a long stretch of beats could result in me becoming diabetic. Totally worth it.

 

 

 

Dealing with a downswing

The hardest thing about playing poker is dealing with a downswing.

Whether you are a professional who puts in twelve-hour days or just an amateur who plays a few tournaments a week, there is nothing more soul-destroying than when the poker gods decide to have a laugh at your expense and give you a shitty run of beats.

Poker is probably one of the only professions in the world where you can put in a full day’s work, give it 110% and come back with less money than when you started.

The problem is that when you are winning you feel invincible. All of your raises are getting paid off, you’re hitting flops and taking down pots as big as your head.

Amateurs start thinking their pipe dreams of making a living off the game aren’t so far fetched after all.

Unfortunately, the euphoria of these hot streaks quickly wears off when the odds starting catching up to you.

And this is where I find myself now. It’s only been a week since I posted that I was running like Jason Mercier and the downswing I predicted at the time seems to be coming to fruition.

Since that last post I’ve cashed in just two tournaments out of 19, both of which were minimum cashes, meaning the Challenge bankroll has taken a bit of a hammering over the week.

These are still early days and downswings can go on for weeks, months and even years in some cases – but I believe you learn more about your play during the low periods than you do when you’re running good.

Here is a list of things I try to do when the cards are running bad.

Don’t Tilt: Not tilting is easier said than done of course, but I take a break if I start playing like a tool

Review my hands: It’s easy to blame the cards but am I playing hands perfectly? Unlikely

Put it in perspective: Remember that everyone has downswings, no one can run good forever (except Mercier)

Don’t change my game: When the cards are running bad, it is tempting to tighten up or get more aggressive. I become an absolute rock. However, it’s always best to stick to an existing winning style

Stay positive: I’ve worked $0 into $140 in around 2 months, so I should stop bitching

Failing all that, I could always sell all my possessions and retire to a Buddhist monastry for the next five years like Andy Black.

Black took a five year break due to the emotional lows of poker

Summary

Challenge: -$16.33

Total winnings so far: $145.62

My downswing at 888 Poker

 

Alcohol and poker: Round II

A couple of weeks ago I won a tournament after having several beers. After the win, I discussed the pros and cons of drinking while playing and I reached the conclusion that, in moderation, alcohol can be beneficial in adding a bit of aggression to your game.

With that in mind, I went to the G Casino in Bolton and played in a £20 tournament. Unfortunately, I didn’t stick to my own advice and got absolutely hammered.

Instead of playing better, I was much much worse. I was so drunk that I was unaware of what the blinds and antes were, meaning I over-raised on loads of hands, needlessly committing extra chips.

I also managed to under-raise when I was trying to steal the blinds with Q4 off-suit. This meant I flat called instead of raising. Luckily, the flop was favourable and I was able to take it down with a later bet.

Normally, beer would make me play more hands, but because I didn’t trust my judgement, I was being really nitty and folding some fairly big hands in position.

Despite all this, I managed to reach the final table through an amazing run of luck in showdowns – including being all-in with KJ against AK and hitting trip jacks.

I even went to the final table as one of the larger stacks and would have been an overwhelming chip leader if I had held up on a coinflip with pocket 3s just before the break.

Me and my friend Michael (Mick) made it to the final table

I’d gone with two friends and one of them, Mick, also made it to the final table.

Here is where my insobriety really punished me. I sat in the wrong seat! Mick and I were the last two to the table and I ended up sitting in his seat.

It was only the day after that we noticed what happened, to my great chagrin – particularly as he made it to 5th and got £200, whereas I busted out in 9th and got just £85.

Despite my poor play, I actually did manage to get my money in good on the last hand. Someone pushed with Q9 and I picked up AQ.

However, karma reared its ugly head and I found myself getting beat by trip 9s. An almost identical hand to where I sucked out with KJ earlier.

At least, this is what I’ve been told happened. You see, I was so drunk that when I woke up the next day I could barely remember anything from the final table and I’ve had to ask my friends to fill in the gaps so that I could write this post.

Here are the positives and negatives from the tournament summarised

Positives

• For the first two hours, I played some pretty good poker. I made a couple of nice plays that I was very pleased with
• I’ve made two out of two final tables in live tournaments
• I didn’t really feel there were any players that were a massive threat

Negatives

• I played way too tight. I did suffer from pretty polarised hands in that I had either premium cards or absolute crap, so I ended up playing a standard tight-aggressive style
• I got too drunk (obviously). This not only meant I was guilty of some horiffic errors in judgment, it also ate away any profit I made on the night (the £40 profit I made all went on beer)
• I was lucky. I was all-in about 3 times when we were down to the last 15 or so entrants and my hand held up every time

The biggest lesson I’ve learnt is to make sure I limit the beers I have when I’m in a tournament like this. No more than 4 pints over the course of the night.

It’s gutting to think I could have made 5th or better if I had just sat in the right seat. Mick had started with less chips than me too. Only a few big blinds worth less, but with the blinds at 3,000/6,000 and 500 antes, it could have made the difference.

The top prize was around £900, although some of this was shaved off to give money to the person who finished 10th, as originally the format only paid people who made the top 9.

Better luck next time.

As a side note, I’m suffering a bit of a downswing on the Challenge recently through a mixture of bad luck and a few poor decisions.

It’s probably not worth making a whole new post about it, so I will summarise this week’s losses here instead.

Summary

Live poker profit: +£40 (The tournament was £25 entry, with one £20 add-on and I won £85)

Total casino profit: £191

Challenge: -$17.50

Total Challenge profit: $161.95

 

First tournament win at live poker

I won my first tournament since I started playing poker again on Monday, and it came from an unlikely source – live poker. I’ve not really played much casino poker over the years, and on those occasions I’ve been pretty terrible.

The main reason, I believe, is because I often go with other friends and I hate the thought of going out first and having to wait around for them to play. Selfish? Totally. However, this approach usually leads to me being an absolute nit, only playing premium hands in position and slowly blinding myself to oblivion after a couple of hours.

This time though, I played pretty aggressively and it helped me to win first place. Unfortunately, the prize pool wasn’t particularly impressive. The event was a £15 buy-in at the Grosvenor Casino in Manchester, although £5 of each entry went on bounties. If you knocked someone out, you received £5 (or £20 if you knocked out randomly allocated super bounties).

While this makes the game a bit more fun, it also drastically reduces the prizepool for those who place, so I only received £170 for my win (£150 for first and £20 in bounties). What’s even more aggravating is that I missed out on three bounties where I absolutely crippled people during an all-in, but because they had a few more chips they survived only to be knocked out a couple of hands later for someone else to pick up the money, with one being a juicy £20 one.

That aside, there were a number of positives and negatives that I have taken away from the win:

Positives

• I only made one serious mistake all tournament (which, incidentally, nearly knocked me out)
• I felt confident I was one of the best players there
• I managed to maintain aggression despite my usual tendency to clam up in casinos

Negatives

• The mistake I did make was horrific, a bad bluff that was NEVER going to work against the kind of opponents you meet in casinos
• I definitely need to brush up on my poker face and keep a lid on my emotions. Somehow playing in a piddly little tournament had my heart racing like a greyhound on crack. More competitive live experience is required, something you can’t learn online
• I was pretty jammy! I won all my coinflips and no-one outdrew me when I held the best hand. I was all-in three times and I won all three

I did have a fantastic time though and it is far more exhilarating than playing online. I will definitely be looking around for some tournaments in my area to try and boost my live skills, which haven’t really had a workout since I was in first year of university in 2003.

Unfortunately, I got home after the event and realised I hadn’t taken any pictures of my final chip stack or my winning hand (AJos) as a memento of my first live casino win. I appreciate it’s not the WSOP, but I think a photo always breaks up a blog post pretty well! Maybe next time.

I’ll also take a note of any interesting hands I get involved in, as I can barely remember any of the ones from Monday.

Summary

Casino poker profit: £151 (£170 – £15 entry – £4 extortionate tournament fees)